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Sk8withGuns
 Post subject: Chuck Norris joke thread!
PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:06 am 
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Post your favorite chuck norris jokes! I'll start it off.

Chuck Norris seceratly sleeps with every women in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result.

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G9King
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 5:17 am 
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Just one reminder: Please let's keep this with non-very mature jokes.

Thanks. :happy:


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Plushie
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 6:16 am 
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I want to see Krumpie and Fatals Jokes. those 2 are the best at it ;-)

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Okay Okay, you could say. that I'm not out of the woods yet.
Suprisingly I have figured out something very important from Haruhi Suzumiya series also becoming one of the greatest Anime's for me.
What was so suprising from Haruhi Suzumiya?.. I have thought of the same thing some years ago...
I always see life as a boring lot of 'Nothing' ah?
Ah yes but Dreams are the key to fix your boredom. If you cannot make those dreams become... Reality
I live in the Real world where things like that cannot happen.. so..... I have figured my Million Dollar question.

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Samantha
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 10:10 am 
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Chuck Norris? <.<
You should tell/show somthing about him for ppl who don't know who he is...

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Super
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:41 pm 
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chuck norris doesnt do push ups, he pushes the world down


every night, the boogieman checks under his bed for chuck norris


chuck norris stole the cookie from the cookie jar (mine ^^)


"Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.


"and on the eigth day, god created chuck norris"


chuck norris, is what willis was talking about


Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris (had to post that one)


Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, but Chuck Norris never cries.


Chuck Norris can drown a fish!


Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.


When god said, "Let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say please."


Chuck Norris once finished "The Song that Never Ends".


The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.

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Demanded
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 2:43 pm 
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Nice ones Super!

I especially like the one about Boogieman :grin:

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Prymecutz
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:47 pm 
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[align=center]

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.[/align]

More Chuck Norris Facts

* When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

* Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

* There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

* Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

* Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

*

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
* Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

* Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

* There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

* When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

* Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

* Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

* Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

* Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

* Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

* Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

* Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

* Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
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G9King
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 5:57 pm 
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Chuck Norris fanboys wrote:
Chuck Norris can drown a fish!

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.


There were many good ones! But I specially liked these, although I had read them before. :laughsweat:


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Prymecutz
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 6:15 pm 
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G9King wrote:
Chuck Norris fanboys wrote:
Chuck Norris can drown a fish!

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.


There were many good ones! But I specially liked these, although I had read them before. :laughsweat:


ROFL same ones i like.
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Samantha
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 24, 2008 6:24 pm 
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haha xD This is funny :p

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[s]GamerChris[/s]
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 3:33 pm 
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I rl loled at these. Especially Jonah's. Very nice. I think someone deserves +K?
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Sk8withGuns
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 10:48 pm 
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Chuck Norris decided to sell his urine as a caned beverage, you may know this as redbull.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.

Chuck Norris once round house kicked a mcdonalds and turned it into a wendsy.

Chuck Norris isnt hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

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Prymecutz
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 11:05 pm 
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Chuck Norris isnt hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris. <-------- ROFL and norris is hung like me! ahahahaha

huck Norris decided to sell his urine as a caned beverage, you may know this as redbull. <------- good one
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Samantha
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 9:57 am 
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Oro.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdD54rG9oQA[/youtube]

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War sux ! Let's party !!

When did I realize I was god?
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[s]GamerChris[/s]
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PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 12:13 pm 
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Lol. They have everything you need on youtube. Isnt that right sam. :roll:
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Sk8withGuns
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 5:27 pm 
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Prymecutz wrote:
Chuck Norris isnt hung like a horse, horses are hung like Chuck Norris. <-------- ROFL and norris is hung like me! ahahahaha

huck Norris decided to sell his urine as a caned beverage, you may know this as redbull. <------- good one

Lol, thank you!

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[s]GamerChris[/s]
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:17 pm 
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Lol. Check this website out. http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
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Samantha
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 5:31 am 
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GamerChris wrote:
Lol. They have everything you need on youtube. Isnt that right sam. :roll:

:blink: :neutral:

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War sux ! Let's party !!

When did I realize I was god?
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Apollo
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 10:08 am 
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Wow i love all these joke where do you guys find/come up with these jokes?
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G9King
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 5:12 pm 
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Apollo wrote:
Wow i love all these joke where do you guys find/come up with these jokes?


Just as the internet is the source of many great things, it is the source of all evil also.
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Prymecutz
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PostPosted: Fri Jun 27, 2008 5:26 pm 
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krump had some good ones im waiting on him posting them...............KRUMPUS! NOW!!!!!!!!!! my life for urs! hahaha
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Sk8withGuns
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PostPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 6:19 pm 
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Cmon people no more chuck jokes?

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